A mission report to the Sandaime
by Hadrian Uzumaki
Summary: Even the God of Shinobi needs a break sometimes, but hey, that's what hazing the new guy is for isn't it?


**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters though I wish I did then maybe he won't suck so much compared to sasuke.**

**Mission report to the Sandaime**

The room was big and spacious with large wooden walls and a single solitary door, red instead of the timbered brown of the walls. Soft yellow lights glow, surrounding the room, illuminating the multitudes of books lining the shelves that make up the walls.

A small fireplace is at one side of the room, providing warmth to ward off the chill of winter. Across the small red door lies an enormous desk, the only piece of furniture in the room. A man sat in an elaborate chair facing the red door, his arms held in front of his face, fingers steepled, as his cold calculating eyes gazed off into the distance.

A soft, timid knock on the door was barely heard over crackling noise of the fireplace but the man's eyes narrowed into sharp slits at the sound and a quiet "enter" carried across the room. The doorknob was twisted open and a small, mousy man with glasses too large for his face walked in hesitantly.

He was wearing a disheveled suit, a size too large for his small frame, his tie askew and sweat pouring down his face, which he failed to surreptitiously wipe off. He held a tattered briefcase tightly to his chest, as if it were a shield as he nervously looked at the man behind the desk not daring to meet his sharp gaze.

Time seemed to stand still as he stood there beside the door, nervously fidgeting before the scrutiny of the powerful man in front of him. As he gawked awkwardly at the man his shadow seemed to grow, encompassing the large room, the sound of the fireplace faded of with the deafening beating of his heart, it took all his strength to remain standing as those steely grey eyes raked over his form judging him silently.

"Come closer." Those two softly spoken words immediately broke the spell that he was under and it was all he could do not to run away at that moment. He steeled himself, and slowly approached, feeling much like a toad hypnotized by a snake as he felt his body carry him forward, closer to that man.

A few feet away from the desk the voice called out again "stop." His body immediately froze one foot forward as he hesitantly drew it back, trying and failing to hide his nervous shaking.

The man sat there, unmoving and silent, as if he had been hewn from a rock despite the aura of power that seeped out his eyes. Those grey eyes that had been inspecting him, giving him Goosebumps, snapped quickly to the briefcase he held before his body.

With the gaze gone the mousy man almost gave a huge sigh of relief, feeling a great weight lift off his shoulders, but it was immediately replaced by a deep, all-penetrating sense of fear and terror at the small glint in the man's eyes as he looked at the briefcase, as if he could see right through it.

"Do you have it?" That small sentence nearly stopped his heart cold in terror while bringing a sense of relief that this would soon be over for him. Barely stuttering out a yes the man fumbled with the briefcase for what felt to him like ages before carefully removing a single folder out of the bag.

It was a simple parcel, a dull yellowish manila folder except for the dark red lettering enclosed in a similarly colored box that spelt out **S.P.L.I.N.T.E.R.** with great care and reverence, the man slowly placed the folder onto the desk, treating it like a fragile holy relic.

The man behind the desk stared at the folder, his attention drawn to the bold red lettering. His eyes gleamed and a small smirk could be seen on his lips before he gave a sinister grin, his sharp teeth gleaming white like a tiger that had its prey walk right up into its mouth. It took all of his courage for the poor man not to faint as a softly purred "excellent" left that predatorial smile.

'Click'. The man at the desk had taken out a wooden pipe from his robes and lit it with a spark from his fingers. Suddenly the whole atmosphere of the room lightened up and the large dark unidentifiable mass behind the man disappeared showing an idyllic view of the great village of Konohagakure.

Sarutobi sat there with the pipe in his mouth, puffing slowly, staring disinterestedly at the new chunin assistant, as he looked around bewildered, as if he had been caught in a Genjutsu.

He took the pipe out of his mouth and gave a warm grandfatherly smile. "You can go now." The chunin snapped his gaping mouth shut, saluted to him and quickly scampered out thinking he had been dreaming.

The third Hokage sat there chuckling to himself, "Ah newbies, what would we do without you." He set down his pipe and a small orange novel replaced it as he started giggling to himself with blood trailing down his nose.

His two Anbu looked at each other with a small sweat drop, wondering if other ninja villages had to deal with such eccentric leaders.

**Author's Note: Hey this is Hadrian. This is my first story on this site and hopefully not my last. I just had this thought after actually writing a piece of work for my English teacher. Anyways I hope you guys enjoyed it and please give me reviews on what you thought about it.:) If its flames I may hate you for the rest of your life, just warning you.**


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